Irony

Isn't the world of an eating disorder funny. Here everything is backwards. In this world people aren't looking forward to meals they are dreading them. Here in this world seeing friends is much more of a burden than it has to be because they just don't understand, so isolation clearly becomes the better option. Here everyone is dying to eat their fruits and vegetable, and no one wants to touch a dessert. Here the word puke doesn't mean that you are sick it means you have the same disease as everyone else. In this crazy world too thin does not exist. Even the idea of death doesn't seem scary sometimes, at least then you wouldn't have to deal with this pain. And the thing is that in this world most of these people had the seemingly "perfect" lives before they entered.

The even scarier part is trying to make a jump from this world to recovery. Because in recovery you can't hide from the feelings and the emotions anymore you have to face them. But thats the thing...I don't want to. It's been a rough weekend, I don't know how I am feeling. I think I am going to call someone who understands because i feel like I just need to vent.